Ask L and Light
by MindMess
Summary: Ever wanted to ask your favorite Death Note character a question? Well, look no further! Here you can ask them anything you want and they will answer them just for you. Who knows, you might even get a chance to appear on the show! PM questions only. Keep it a T rating please.
1. Episode 1

**Welcome to ask L and Light!**

Host - Ask L and Light! Pretty simple, right! You ask questions and these two will answer them.

Light – What do you mean, us two?

L – Its pretty simple really. The readers will ask questions in the reviews and we will have to answer them. However, I give it a 40% chance that no one will see this and no one will ask us questions and then we wi-

Host – Ok, ok. I don't mind if no one asks anything, we can just talk, right? We could even introduce some other people like Near and Mello, that's only if you, the readers, want us too.

L – Blimey, I haven't seen those two in a while. We should really catch up…

Light – We'll have time for that later. Now, host? What are we going to do now? We don't have any questions to answer.

Host – Well, we will just talk, if that's ok with you.

Light – That's fine.

L - …

Host – L?

L – Huh? What? Whats wrong?

Host – Nevermind. Now, hmmm… *Looks at papers* Well, what about this. Do you two get on together now?

Light – We always got on together. Right, L?

L – Yeah… *Starts chewing thumb* Hmmm…

Host – L? What are you thinking?

L – Do you really want me to answer that?

Host – Not really. Maybe we should just conclude this here.

Light – That would be the best plan of attack.

L – If we conclude here, the writing would be about 30% shorter so the person typing this all out doesn't have to type as much. Yeah, that's a good plan.

Host – Ok, thanks for being with me today. Please post your questions to L and Light about anything and anyone and goodnight!

L - *Stands up and walks off* Cake…

* * *

**Hi Guys.**

**I want to say sorry to all the people who had seen this and were following it before I had to re-upload it. I want to say that if you have a question that you want to ask L or Light, PM me. DON'T ask it in a review. I won't answer those. Don't get me wrong, I love your reviews and I love constructive criticism but don't ask questions to L and Light in them. Thanks.**

**-MindMess**


	2. Episode 2

**Episode 2 - Cake and Visitors  
**

Host – Welcome back guys! Welcome to 'Ask L and Light Yagami'! We actually have questions now! So, lets get started!

L – Boy, you're enthusiastic…

Light – Whats wrong with being enthusiastic?

L – Well, there is… Um…Its just gets a little annoying at times…

Host – Um… Ok… I'll try and not be as jolly as I was before. Can I explain the new format?

L – Go ahead.

Light – Sure.

Host – Ok, well, there is going to be the general 'I-ask-L-and-Light' questions but if I like a review enough, or it makes me laugh, I will invite that person to be up on stage with me! Today, that person is DuskFairie! The reason? Because she posted the first review and made me laugh. So, welcome DuskFairie!

DuskFairie – Kee! *Runs up onto stage and huggles L*

L – I… Um… Er… Well… Thanks, I quess…

DuskFairie - *Straitens up and takes a seat. Turns to L* You're so cute!

Host – Please, DuskFairie, calm down! Now, are you going to ask some questions?

DuskFairie – Don't worry! I will ask you some questions! *Turns back to L* Lawli, what is your favourite type of cake?

L – Lawli? Erm… Favourite cake? Well… Strawberry cheesecake has always been a favourite however… I like all cakes… Cakes…

DuskFairie – And Light-Kun, do you have a crush on L?

Light – Wha… What! What a-a-are you s-s-saying!

DuskFairie – I know you do!

Light - …

Host – Do you Light? I never knew!

Light – I… Um… I don't… Well… I mean…

L – Really Light?

Light – A friend crush! Nothing more! Please! Believe me! *Looks at feet, blushing*

Host – Anything else, DuskFairie?

DuskFairie - Oh, and L you have been my anime crush for the last... three years and are the reason that I don't have a boyfriend. That's probably because I spend all my time watching anime. But anyway, I love both of you so much and think that you would make such a cute couple!

Light - …

L - … You don't have a boyfriend…?

Light – L, are you suggesting something?

L – W-what! No, I didn't mean it like that! I meant that… Um… I just don't understand why you don't have a boyfriend… You're nice… And pretty…

Light – W-what…? *Looks at shoes again*

L – Are you ok Light-Kun?

Light - …

Host – Anything else to add, DuskFairie?

DuskFairie – Well… Not really… But here! *Passes L a cake and Light-Kun some chips*

L – Cake! Mmmm…

Light – L, say thank you! Don't be rude.

L – Wha-what? Oh, thanks DuskFairie! Cake…

Host – Thank you for being on this show with us. Bye!

DuskFairie – Bai!

Light – Bye!

L – Bye!

DuskFairie - *Walks of stage*

Host – Well, wasn't that nice. Please, L, don't eat that cake now. You need to answer more questions!

L – Huh…? *Looks up with cake-filled mouth* Oh, sorry… *Swallows and puts cake down*

Host – Ok, lets get to question time. L?

L – Yeah?

Host – CelloNinjaAngel asks L, what would you do if your IQ dropped by 30 points? Would you rememberstuff and/or have the same deduction skills?

L – Hmm… Well if my IQ dropped by 30 points, I would still be able to function normally but I wouldn't be able to think as clearly as I do now. There would be not much of a difference execpt that everything would be harder.

Host – Ok, thanks L. Well… Um… I've saved these till last… Um…

Light – What is it?

Host – Um… Do you really wanna answer these?

L – Ok, as long as –

Light- Yeah. We do.

L – Hey!

Host – Well… ThunderPants009 asks L, have you done anything… Ahem… Sexual… With cake…?

L – What! I… um… That's not the sort of question I could answer. But, if you really wanna know… No, I haven't.

Host – Ok… He asks Light…

Light – Is this like the other 'question'?

Host – Note really… Well… Light? Do you find Ls 'quirks' cute sometimes?

L – Now, this is a interesting one…

Light – I… Um… The way he sits is nice… and eating only cakes and candy is cute… Well…

L – Well?

Light – Yes! Well… Sometimes… Can we just leave it?

Host – Ok. Now, this is a question for both of you. Its really… Ahem… 'Odd' You sure you wanna hear it?

Light – We will face anything!

L – Yeah…

Host – Ok… *Reads off of the sheet really quickly* If you could have intercourse each other right now, what would be your location choice? Who would be seme/Uke? And any toys involved?

Light – What! I'm not answering that!

L – Well… If we were to… you know… Do 'it', Light would probbaly –

Light - *Covers Ls mouth* Don't. Just… Don't…

Host – Well, that just about wraps things up. Any last words?

L – *Shoves Lights hand away* Note really. Thanks for sending in questions. I will eat my… Wheres my cake gone!

Light – I don't know…

L – My cake is gone! *Jumps up and starts looking* Where is it!

Light – Um… Thanks…

Host – Thank you for sending in questions. We will see you next time! And, goodbye! 


	3. Episode 3

**Cakes and Crushes**

Host – Welcome back guys! This is 'Ask L and Light'!

Light – Why is it 'Ask L and Light'? Couldn't it be the other way round? You know, 'Ask Light and L'?

L – Well, the arrangement its in now makes it 40% easier to read. I prefer it like this

Light – You would…

Host – Ok! On today's show, there are two returning people with more questions! Unfortunately, no one can actually make it onto the stage today but they have left you questions and other things…

L – Cake?

Host – Maybe…

L – Yes!

Light – You eat too much cake, you know…

Host – Are you two ready?

L – Anything for cake…

Light – He means yes. We both do.

Host – Ok! Lets get going! The first set of questions are from DuskFairie, again. However, she has left us a message by video for you two. Wanna see it?

Light – Her? Erm… *Moves closer to L, protectively* Ok

L – Yeah… She gave me cake…

Light - *Glares at L*

L – What?

Host – Ok guys, lets not make this awkward. *Nods to backstage* Play the video!

DuskFairie – Hi L and Light! I have some things I wanna say before Mr Host reads off my questions. One, Light got jealous of m-me… And I am so glad I got to talk to L!

Light – Cute? *Looks at L* I'm not cute, right?

L – Well…

Light – L!

L – What?

DuskFairie - And Light-! You almost surpassed L in cuteness with your hesitation to admit your feelings, and all the blushing, Kee! *Hugs the camera*

L – I'm cute?

Light – Feelings?!

DuskFairie - Okay. okay, I'm calming down now! Because there really are some more things that I wanted to know. And L! Your cake is gone!

L – Yes… All gone…

DuskFairie – Theres a little something at the end of the show for you…

L – Cake…?

Host – Erm…

DuskFairie – Thank you! Bai again!

Host - *Switches video off* Ready for the questions?

Light – Cute…?

L – Cake…

Host – I'll take that as a yes. These are written by DuskFairie herself. This is not me speaking! *Laughs*

Light - *Gulps*

Host – Ok, lets go! *Looks at card* L-chan, how many languages can you speak? And what is your favourite one?

Light - *Splutters* L-chan?!

L – Well, *Ignoring Light* I can speak Japanese and English. I am currently taking online classes for Spanish and German and I would love to learn Tai one day. And favourite one? English. By far.

Host – Ok. You ave another question, L. *Looks back at card* And seeing that Light won't say if he has a crush on you, can you tell me if you have a crush on him?

Light – What?! You can't be serious!

L – Well… He is kinda cute sometimes…

Light – You what?

L – I merely said you were cute sometimes. I like you… erm…

Light – You like me…?

L – Only as a friend, ok? Nothing more! Please…! *Hides face to hide blush*

Light – Oh… Ok…

Host – Oookaaayy… Next question. Light-kun, what was your favourite subject at school? Were there any sports apart from tennis that you played?

Light – Subjects? Well, English is one of my favourites. I suppose… *Thinks* Maths wasn't bad. Ans sports? I loved swimming as a kid though I gave it up at around 13 years old. I still can swim, I think…

Host – Maths, eh? Ok. And… Erm… Light? Would you mind if L-chan and DuskFairie went on a date?

Light - *Splutters* What! I… um…

Host – Joke!

Light – Joke… Grrr…

L – I wouldn't mind as long as Light could come along as well.

Light – Really L?

L – Really. When I have been wrong?

Light – I suppose…

Host – That's all of the questions that DuskFairie has for you two. However, L?

L – Huh?

Host - *Passes strawberry cheesecake* A gift from DuskFairie.

L – Wow! My favourite! Thanks! *Grabs cake and starts eating*

Light – Please slow down, L, you're going to get sick. And can you please wait until after the show?

L – Awww… *Places cake down*

Host – Ok, on to the next set of questions. These are from ChelloNinjaAngel. They ask L, Which would you prefer? Light or Cake?

L – Well… I would have to go with… um… Can light have the cake with him? If so then I would pick Light. If not, I would not be able to chose…

Light – You would pick me?

L – Only if you had cake in your hads…

Light – Oh…

Host – And another question, L, if Light smashed your favourite cake in the world, what would you do?

L – Get another one.

Host – Ok… I was expecting a better answer but ok.

L – You want a better answer? Well, there is only a 20% chance that –

Light – *Speaks really quickly* Any more questions?

Host – No, that is it really. Well, thank you for listening and we hope to see you again!

L – Cake time… *Gets cake and starts eating* Cake…

Light – Thanks for listening. *Turns to L* For Gods sake, its only cake…

L – Only cake! DuskFairie gave me this! And its my favourite! And-

Light – Nevermind.

Host – Again, thank you for watching and we will see you next time! Bye!


	4. Episode 4

**Episode 4 - Cake and Evil.**

Host – Welcome back to 'Ask L and Light'! The main stars are in the back room so I am going to have a couple of words with you. DuskFairie, *Turns to camera and winks* I have set them up for a date? Its tonight. Do you want to know what happens in the date? Just ask and the writer will post it. *Smiles*

'Pause'

Host – Thunderpants009, we are very sorry for mistaking you for a guy. We all apologise. Although, it will probably happen again. Oh dear…

'Longer pause'

Host – Shall we bring them in? Come in!

'L and Light walk on stage and take a seat'

L – Did we miss anything important?

Host – Not really. Shall we start?

Light – Yes, we are all ready.

Host – Ok, the first question is from ChelleNinjaAngel. Well, actually it's a revised version of their previous question but still, it's a good one. L?

L – Huh?

Host - If Light smashed your favourite cake so it's completely inedible and it was the last sweet in the whole world what would you do?

L – He what?! He wouldn't… *Turns to Light* Would you?

Light – I would never think of doing something like that!

Host – But, what if he did?

L – I would get very angry and upset. Then, after a few days, I would start having withdrawal symtoms and I would st- *Light covers Ls mouth*

Light – I don't think the audience would really like to know. *Releases L*

L - *Gasps and pants for air* There was no need for that Light-kun!

Light – Light-Kun?

L – *Gasps* I said Light. No Kun on the end! Just Light!

Host – Suuuuree you did. Lets move on. The next set of questions are from thunderpants009. She asjks you… *Gulps* I'm sorry. We'll have to skip these questions. They are too… Ahem… Inappropriate for us to read out on stage.

Light – Huh? Let me see. *Grabs sheet and looks at questions* Wha…?

L – What is it Light?

Light - *Gulps and hands back the sheet* You don't want to know…

Host – Ok, we have DuskFairies questions here. She is becoming quite a regular to this show. She might have to come on it again. What do you think guys?

L – She's nice. She gives me cake…

Light – Maybe some other time.

L – Why?

Light – Just because.

L – Awww…

Host – *Grins* Ok, the questions. L? Have you ever kissed anyone before?

L - …

Light – Have you?

L – Well… No… No one ever wanted too…

Light – Oh…

L - *Sighs*

Light – Cheer up…

Host – Okaay… Next question. Light?

Light – Yeah?

Host – What kind of music do you listen too?

Light – Well, I listen to a lot of music. Its hard to pin point a certain type of music. Everything in gerneral. Maybe not classical and I like rock at lot but it depends on what mood I am in at the moment.

Host – Ok. Now we have ChaosLovesTannins questions.

Light – Cool name…

L – And L isn't?

Light – I never said that!

Host – Ok, the first question is for L-kun. L?

L – I hope this is good…

Host – It is. Its actually a really good question. L? What would you do if you weren't the world's greatest detective?

L – Oh, that IS a good question. Let me think… *Starts chewing thumb* I would probably be some sort of police officer or something like that. Hang on! Maybe a teacher. Yeah, that would be nice. Teaching other people how to do things. Yeah, I would probably be a teacher.

Light – Really? Hmm… Yeah, it suits you…

L – Really?

Light – Yeah. I mean, you're clever and you love kids, it would be the second best job after what you already are.

L – Aww… Thanks Light-Kun

Light - *A small smile twitches at the edges of his mouth*

Host – Ok. The next question is for Light. Light? Why did you want to save the world so much? I mean, you did but the way you did it destroyed the balance in the system. Not good Light.

Light – Um… I… Do I have to answer that?

L – Yes. I would also like to know why you did it?

Light – Well... I wanted to clear the world from evil. To stop the bad people harming the good. I understand now the way I did it was not the best but I… Um… I hope you understand…

L – Hmm…

Host – Ok. L?

L – Yeah?

Host – Who would you chose for your next successor? Near or Mello?

L – I… Um…

Light – Yeah L. I would also like to know who you would choose.

L – I'm sorry Mello, but I would have to pick Near. Only because he doesn't let his emotions get in his head like you do. However, you are better than him in some areas while he just knows how to keep his head straight. I'm sorry to both of you but… Um… I…

Host – Shall we leave the matter?

L – Yeah…

Host – And L? Have you ever… ahem… gotten 'laid'?

L – What! I… I never…

Light – Have you?!

L -No! Of course not!

Light – Hmm…

Host – Ok…

'Awkward pause'

Host – NaruHinaLuvr also asks you, Light?

Light – Yeah?

Host – Do you find Misa annoying? And if you like or have feeling for L, then why did you want to kill him so much?

Light – I do find Misa annoying. VERY annoying…

'Pause'

Light – And I wanted to… um… kill L when I was crazy. You know, in Kira mode. I don't now. I would never dream of it now…

L - *Glares*

Light – I'm sorry…

Host – Ok, that's all the questions we have-

? - *Evil laughter*

Host – Huh?

Aki - HA! Aki's back, L! Remember that last time I was with you? Henh, henh, henh...

L - *Goes paler, well, paler then he already is* Why are you here Aki?

Light –You know her?

L – We go back a loong way…

Aki – That's right. And when I heard you were doing a Q/A show, I decided to come along with a few question of my own… Henh Henh…

L – What do you want?

Host – You don't have any right to be here!

Aki - *Pays no attention to Host* Ok, questions! L, are you ever going to pay me back for that cake, years ago? I'm starting to add interest!

L – Cake?

Aki – Yes, THAT cake.

L – Oh… THAT cake… I… um… I don't have any cash on me now…

Light – How much do you want?

Aki – That can be sorted afterwards… Light, did Ryuk ever ask you for dating advise?

Light – Huh? No, he never did…

Aki – Hmm…

'Pause'

Aki - Both, now, no avoiding this question, I have two Shinigami at the ready! *hold up apples and chocolate, Ryuk and Sidoh show up* WHO'S THE UKE AND WHO'S SEME!?

Light – Wha… What!

L – What? You can't be asking us that! Its inappropriate!

Host – That's it! Get out!

Aki - *Is turned round by guards and pushed away. Looks over her shoulder and yells* And L! I wouldn't eat that cake *points at cake on table*, Mello slipped in a drug because I blamed you for the time I poisoned his chocolate... hehe

L – There's cake?! *Turns round and sees cake* Noooo… How can you poison cake!

Aki - *Evil Laugh* Aki is out! *Disappears*

Host – Well… That was unexpected…

L – How can you poison cake…?

Host – Don't worry L. I have something here… *Pulls out Stawberry Cheesecake and a panda cake.* DuskFairie sent you the Cheesecake and thunderpants009 sent you the panda cake.

L – Cake! *Grabs cake and starts eating* DuskFairie again? She's really nice…

Light - *Glowers*

Host – And, Light? This is for you… Don't ask. Thunderpants009 sent it.

Light - *Takes bulb* Um… Thank you?

Host – That's about all we have for today. Tune into next episode for more drama and excitement. We hope you all have a great day and Goodbye!


	5. Episode 5

**Episode s - Cake and Kisses**

Host – Hi Guys! As you might have noticed, L and L are not with me right now. That's only because, well, they have just been on a secret date set up by us! We recorded the whole thing and we are going to show it to you. Just don't tell them, ok? *Grins* Play the film!

* * *

As the film begins rolling, the studio comes into view. Only, its different. Its cleaner and, well, it doesn't look like a studio, more like a restaurant. As the film goes on, Light suddenly comes into the studio. He looks puzzled and looks around.

"Hello?" He says, walking over to the table in the centre. Once realising no one is there, he sits down at the table and waits. After a couple of minutes, he hears a voice.

"Light?" Light turns round and sees L. L was looking equally as puzzled. "Why are you here? I was told to come here to discuss the show."

Light sighed. "Me too." He shook his head. "Sit down?" He asked, nodding his head towards the empty seat opposite him.

L slowly approached the seat and swung himself onto it, sitting in her usual crouched position. "Do you know why we are here?" He asked the brunette.

"No. I thought you did." Light sighed. Was this some sort of joke? "Are we the only ones here?" H asked, cautiously.

"As far as I know." L replied. They both looked around. Light then spotted a table further along with food on it. "You hungry?" He asked L.

"Yes, I was told there would be food here so I didn't eat." L replied, looking at the table with food on it. "Eat?"

"Are you sure? It could be someone else's." Light said, standing up. It was obvious that even if the food wasn't his, he was still going to eat it.

"Well, there is a 30% chance that the food is someone else's…" L said, also standing up in his normal hunched over position. "But… I say we go on the fact that there is a 70% chance that it is ours and was set up for us and we eat it." L said, feeling his stomach growl.

Light didn't need any further encouragement and dashed over to the table and back, bringing along all of the food that was laid on it. "Mmm… Seems they know what we like…" Light said, setting the food down. It was true, who ever made the food knew exactly what they liked. Light had some of his favourite foods, including a bag of potato chips and L had tons of dessert, including a whole cake of strawberry cheesecake.

As Light sat down, he handed L his food. L instantly began to eat the cakes that were set out before them. They both ate in silence until mot of the food was gone. Light was eating his last bag of potato chips and L was finishing of his strawberry cheesecake. "You want a bit?" L offered, holding out a slice of cake towards Light.

"No, I'm fine. You eat it." Light replied, gently pushing the cake away. However, doing so, he looked at Ls face and saw him leaning over him. "L?" L suddenly realised what position he was in a back away.

"I'm sorry Light. I was just looking at you chips…" L said, absent-mindedly.

"Its ok." Light replied, standing up, having finished his food. "You finished?"

"Yes…" L said, looking at the empty plates, sighing. Light smiled at Ls lost expression.

Suddenly Light brought L into a hug. L was shocked but after a few moments of struggling, wrapped his arms back round Light. "Why…?" L mumbled into Lights shoulder.

Light suddenly realised what he was doing and pulled away. "I'm so sorry!" H said, panic edged onto his face. They both looked very awkward as they looked at each other.

"Its ok…" L said, looking at the floor. He shuffled his feet. 'I… um… Do you… um…" He said, hesitantly.

Light looked shocked. "Well… I… " He looked at his feet again. "Yes…" He said quietly.

L nodded. "Well… I… um… Do… yes…" He also said, slowly.

Light looked up. "You do?" He asked, looking at Ls face.

"Yes…" L said. Light sighed and slowly came towards L. He lifted his chin with one finger and before L had time to react, kissed him on the lips. They both stood there for a moment, kissing, before Light pulled away.

"I'm sorry… I just had t-to do t-that…" Light stuttered before running of the stage.

"Light!" L yelled but Light had already gone. L just stood there for ages, before bringing a finger to his lips, feeling where he and Light had kissed. "Light…" He murmured before sitting down and putting his head in his hands.

* * *

Host – There you have it! It was a kinda successful date, don't you think? I wonder what they will do when they next come on stage. What do you think. Thanks for watching this bonus episode of 'Ask L and Light' and good bye!


End file.
